Don'ts in a Long Distance Relationship

Just like any relationship you may experience, the long distance variety is a work in progress.  Unfortunately it requires that little bit extra attention in areas that  normally wouldn't be of great importance. Here are a few pointers for those of you experiencing a long distance relationship.  A lot of advice provided in this area focuses on the Do's and neglects to mention those things that should be avoided.

Don’t expect too much – In the majority of cases long distance relationships are due to one needing to be elsewhere for their job.  Do not expect your partner to be available to message, talk or Skype just because you are not busy.  Keep in mind that they are there to work and time differences are also something to consider.  Just because they are not talking to you, does not mean that they are doing something they shouldn’t be.  Do not let your mind and assumptions get the better of you.

Don’t put yourself in certain situations – Long distance relationships can leave you miserable and lonely.  Do not allow yourself to be in situations that could potentially destroy what you have with your partner.  Opt out of spending time alone with someone who may be a sexual interest, especially if there is alcohol involved.  It would be a shame to jeopardise your relationship just because you are feeling vulnerable.   Be realistic when making decisions about when it comes to situations that may become out of your control. 

Don’t overdo contact – Although the urgency to hear from your partner has amplified, even in a no distance relationship we all need space to do our own thing.  Do not suffocate your partner every second of every day just because they are out of reach.  Remember that you both still have a life of your own, as you would if you were living together.

Don’t expect him or her to come to you all the time – Frequent visits can become very expensive.  Do not expect your partner to always be the one to come to you.  Share the travel between each other.  Also remember just because your partner may have a break from what is keeping them away from you, does not mean that they are realistically able to be by your side.  If you share the travel cost amongst you, it will ensure you have more time together and take the burden of just one of you.

Don’t Flirt – Avoid flirting.  This could give the other person the idea that you are interested and available and get you into situations that could have been avoided.  Save the flirtatiousness for your partner who you are longing to see.

Don’t expect your relationship to fail – If you are a believer that long distance relationships never work out in the end, do your partner a favour and don’t pursue the avenue in the first place.  It will save a lot of your partner’s time when you eventually give up on the idea.  Long distance relationships take a lot of investment and if you are not willing to give it your all, don’t be cruel by allowing your partner to think you’re in it for the long haul.

Don’t Lie – If you can believe it possible, communication is even more important in a long distance relationship.  Be honest with your partner on how you feel.  If you need a day to yourself let your partner know.  Avoid making excuses for why you cannot take their phone call or reply to their emails.  If you start telling the little fibs, it is only a matter of time before you are dishonest about the bigger things of greater importance.


Remember, realistically it may never get easier being away from the person you love and unless someone is/has experienced the distance you are feeling then they are not going to understand how it makes you feel.  But it is important on those hard days to remind yourself that everyday you spend away from each other is one day closer to the day you will see them again.  


Why not buy something to keep in your wardrobe for the day you reignite.  Affordable lingerie and accessories are available here. 


Find our other articles relating to long distance relationships here:-
7 Tips to cope when your partner is away
Valentine's Day for Long Distance Couples

Top 16 Most Romantic Films

      Movies are constantly being filmed every day with writers and directors striving to salvage the romanticism left in the world and reduce the viewers to tears with their latest dramatically told tale of true love.  Here is my pick of the 16 most romantic films in order of their release.

1. Dirty Dancing (1987) 

If ever there was one, this is the movie that needs no introduction. Johnny (Patrick Swayze) and Baby (Jennifer Grey) are from very different worlds. But despite Baby's fathers disapproval they fall victim to a mutual passionate love for one another that breaks all the rules and guides Baby into womanhood. 

2. The Crow (1994)

A year after his brutal murder, Eric Draven (Brandon Lee) is brought back to life by a crow to avenge the death of himself and his finance Sarah (Rochelle Davis). The crow guides him through the land of the living to the members of the gang that took the life of him and his true love.  This movie demonstrates that real is forever.  This movie was dedicated to Brandon Lee after his tragic death during filming.

3. Romeo and Juliet (1996)

Baz Luhrman modernizes Shakespeare's famous play retaining original dialogue with Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes in the lead roles of Romeo and Juliet. Two star-crossed lovers forbidden to embrace their love go to extremes to be together and end up dying for the cause.  Their deaths result in uniting their feuding families.

4. Titanic (1997)

Jack and Rose are from differing social backgrounds.  They fall in love during the ill-fated maiden voyage of the RMS Titanic.  Rose (Kate Winslet) recalls the events of that fateful evening back in 1912 when she lost Jack (Leonardo DiCaprio) to the tragedy that claimed the lives of 1514 people.

5. My Best Friends Wedding (1997)

Julia Roberts convincingly plays Julianne, a woman whose best friend George reveals he's engaged.  This revelation causes her to realize that she is in love with him herself. She sets out to win his affection with outrageous jealousy and only days before the wedding.

6. Meet Joe Black (1998)

Death enters earth in the form of an attractive man named Joe Black (Brad Pitt) who comes with the intentions of taking elderly man Bill Parrish (Anthony Hopkins) with him.  Joe meets Bill's daughter and decides to explore his interest in life on earth while getting to know her on a more personal level. 

      7. Crazy / Beautiful (2001)

     

      Troubled rich girl Nicole falls in love with a poor latino boy Carlos whose dreams and hard work become threatened due to her destructive ways.  He tries to find ways to help her without losing sight of his own dreams.  This 2001 film stars Kirsten Dunst and Jay Hernandez. 

     8. Tuck Everlasting (2002)

       

2002 brought us Tuck Everlasting, the story of a girl named Winnie (Alexis Bledel) who runs away and meets a family in the woods. The Tucks have a secret of immortality. Winnie falls in love with  Jesse Tuck (Johnathon Jackson) and must choose between being immortal with Jesse by her side or experiencing all life has to offer including the inevitability of dying.

9. The Notebook (2004)

 

   

      This 2004 blockbuster is based on the novel of the same name written by the most talented romance novelist of our time Nicholas Sparks.  It stars Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling.  It is a love story about first love between a wealthy girl and a socially unaccepted boy.  Time does not rid the bond they once shared and they find away back into each others lives.

     10. Brokeback Mountain (2005)

     

     Brokeback Mountain is the story of a forbidden and secretive relationship between two cowboys Ennis (Heath Ledger) and Jack (Jake Gyllenhaal) who met each other on Brokeback Mountain in the summer of 1963 whilst herding sheep. The story follows their struggle to maintain their love for another over the years, while keeping up appearances with their wives and living the life acceptable to the world.

      11. P.S I Love You (2007)

       

P.S I Love You is based on the novel by Cecilia Ahern.  It is the tale of an Irishman Gerry and his passionate wife Holly.  Gerry dies young due to illness and Holly is left alone in the world.  In the weeks and months that follow his death Holly finds that Gerry organized letters for her when he was still alive and they are delivered in the most surprising ways.  Every letter relives something from their past together and slowly help Holly move on with her future without him. 

      12. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008)

       

      A baby is brought into the world with a unique condition that forces him to age backwards.  He is abandoned on the stoop of a retirement home by his birth father.  Queenie a caregiver at the home takes him in and raises him as her own naming him Benjamin.  Benjamin meets Daisy, a granddaughter of a woman resident at the home and they become lifelong friends.  Daisy and Benjamin struggle through the changes that come with Benjamin's condition.   

       13. Letters to Juliet (2010)

      

     Sophie (Amanda Seyfried) dreams of becoming a writer and travels to Verona on a pre-honeymoon with her fiance, where she meets the "Secretaries of Juliet".  She answers a letter that was lost with time and the receiver Claire ventures back to Italy to find the man she loved when she was fifteen.  Sophie tags along and unwillingly falls in love with Claire's obnoxious grandson Charlie.  

      14. My Boyfriend's Girlfriend (2010)

      

      The very talented Alyssa Milano portrays Jesse, a wounded woman with a secret whose wit and encouraging nature have struggling writer Ethan falling head over heels.  But who is Troy? Is he the obstacle that is keeping Jesse out of Ethans reach?  This 2010 movie has an interesting twist that you won't see coming.  

   

      15. The Last Song (2010)

      

     Yet another of Nicholas Sparks novels is brought to life in 2010s motion picture "The Last Song."  Miley Cyrus plays a stubborn and rebellious teenager named Ronnie whose parent's divorce has led her to become troubled in her life.  The movie follows her journey of falling in love, forgiving her father and the heartache that comes with growing up.

      

     16. Dear John (2010)

       

  

     Women all over the world can thank Nicholas Sparks for this masterpiece too. Dear John is about a soldier on leave in his hometown.  He meets Savannah in a chance meeting and they become inseparable. When John has to leave for the army they agree to wait for each other and write letters to remain together even when they are apart. There love is put on hold longer when John re-enlists after the 9/11 terrorist attacks.

      I could keep adding more to this topic, but i would like to hear your added thoughts instead.  What are your all time favourite romantic movies?  Leave a comment with those movies that have left you believing in love...

Advantages to Online Dating

Online dating has been known to come with its skepticism.  Many look at this type of dating with cynical eyes and disbelief that anything real can come of it.  I myself once reeked of this judgment when it came to the subject but after giving into my sisters convincing arguments, I am now in a happy relationship with someone that I met online.  Just like any type of engagement dating sites can come with their disadvantages.  There are a lot of people who use these sites that are not looking for devoted relationships and are just looking into it for a bit of uncommitted fun.  But just because you are approached by these kinds of people does not mean you are obligated to acknowledge their advances.  You get to choose who you would like to get to know.  Here are a few advantages of the new age way to meet your next partner.

• Convenience - All that is required to begin your online dating adventures is a computer, the internet and a dating site membership, which you can acquire for free on certain sites. There are members on at all times of the day ready to meet someone special.  You can get to know someone and decide if you are compatible with each other before suggesting or accepting to go out on a date.
• No Obligations - Just because someone is interested in you and making advances to get to know you, does not mean that you have to reciprocate.  Interested parties can ask, but it ultimately comes down to your decisions of who you would like to spend your time getting to know. 
• Privacy is respected -  Although a lot of these sites ask you several questions to discover your goals that they reveal to members of the same status, they do not however reveal personal details about yourself such as your name and address.  When you sign up you use a username and when you are in communications with other members it is up to you what you share about yourself.
• Finding Friends - You are not going to romantically connect with everybody you meet on dating sites but it is possible that you will make new lasting friendships whilst trying to find that connection.
• Variety - Using this medium to find someone special is more common then you think.  Because it has become such a popular way to meet people you will find a variety of people that you might not have met in your normal singles hang-outs.

Here are a few online dating sites circulating the internet today:

Plenty of Fish

RSVP

eHarmony 

Oasis Active

Slinky

Aussie Matchmaker

So, if you're finding it difficult meeting someone offline, let your scepticism go and give online dating a try.  There are millions of likeminded people using online dating sites to meet someone special. You never know, one of them might be exactly who you are looking for!  

If you have an online dating story, please share it with us in a comment below.  We would love to hear your search of true love was achieved behind a computer screen and letters of your keyboard.

The first time you say "I Love You"

Saying “I Love You” for the first time in a relationship is a big step.  Many people pro-long revealing their feelings for fear that it may be too soon for their partner to hear and that it is going to freak them out or scare them off.  Here is some advice for those who are thinking of expressing the three magic words that are the basis of every novel Nicholas Sparks has ever written. These three simple words can make way for many avenues in a relationship.

Take the risk – A significant thing to remember when you reach this point in your relationship is that there is no time frame for how long it takes someone to fall in love and more importantly there is no rule to who goes first.  When you feel it, you feel it and there is no need to keep your partner in the dark about it.  Make the choice to take a leap of faith and disclose your feelings.  There is no greater emotion then the knowledge that you are loved.  Once these words have been said, there is no going back so make sure you mean them. Do not say it for any other reason than to let your partner know how you feel.

Don’t expect the words returned – With the previous being said do not let the fear of not having the words returned discourage you from letting your partner know how you feel.  Just because they are not quite there yet, does not mean that they don’t care about you or that your relationship is not heading in the right direction.  Some people take longer to trust and open up to how they feel and therefore may take longer to instigate their emotion.

Spontaneity – Spontaneity is perhaps the best way to reveal your love for someone.  Let the feeling build up inside of you to the point where your subconscious can’t even keep it within. Like the best life has to offer, it is rarely planned.  If you find yourself having to stop yourself from saying it on a regular basis, it is most likely a sign that it is time to tell your partner know how you feel.  If it comes to mind so often you have to censor yourself, you obviously mean it with all of your heart.

And finally, Repetition – The “L” word is a delicate matter.  Once it has been let out of the bag, there is expectation - (particularly with women) to be reminded of these feelings.  Do not think just because you have said it once there is no cause for it to be uttered again.

Once you have expressed your feelings with words, remember that your actions need to match.  Loving someone is more then vocabulary and it is important to show your partner you understand this. 

Confidence Boosters for Women

Confidence has a huge influence on how others perceive us, not to mention how we feel about ourselves. There are many things in life that can leave us feeling low and sometimes as women all we need is something small to place the confidence back into our step. Here are a few confidence boosters for all women alike.

Get a new hairstyle, cut and colour – There is nothing like a new look. A makeover will leave you feeling fresh and the more people notice the change in you, the more confident you will feel.

Wear sexy underwear – It doesn’t matter if you have someone in your life to reveal your under garments too or if you are just wearing them for yourself. Wearing sexy underwear can make any women feel more confident because she feels sexy. You can buy affordable sexy lingerie here at Confidence is Key Lingerie.

Accept compliments – For most women it is not easy to accept compliments. But try putting your pride aside and instead of dismissing compliments being thrown your way, actually listen to the good things people have to say about you.

Exercise – Not only will you look and feel your best, but you will also ooze confidence as a result of how it has left you feeling.

Spend less time with the mirror – As a general belief woman spend way too much time picking out their flaws when they have too much time in front of the mirror. Shorten your mirror time and you will find the less you pick at your appearance the more confident you will feel.

Girls Night – Get together with your favourite girlfriends for a girls night. Bust out the face masks, have a few homemade cocktails, rent a bunch of DVD’s. Just be yourself!

Smile – it is amazing how great you can feel from such a simple act. People react to it in a positive way which leaves you feeling confident about yourself.

Play Model for a day - If you have a friend or acquaintance that is into photography, enlist your services of being a model for them to photograph. Seeing yourself all dolled up in photographic positions will leave you feeling confident in yourself and most definitely your appearance.

Retail Therapy – No explanation required here.... A new wardrobe is bound to bring any woman a confidence boost!

The next time your confidence is running on empty take a step back and look at yourself through the eyes of others. See the person that they cherish and value in their lives. Just merely believe in who you are and be proud of yourself for it.