Tips For Men on Online Dating

Joining up on a dating site can often be a daunting experience.  Not everyone knows the things that they should be aiming for and the things they should try to avoid.  Here are a few tips aimed at the guys out there who are trying to have a fulfilling and successful experience in the online dating world.

• Don't use pet names. Ie Babe, Sweety, Love, Hun, Sexy, Scrumptious etc.  Not everyone takes well to being called these kinds of nicknames.  Nicknames should be developed over time when you get to know the person.

• Read the profile of the person you are interested in.  This gives you the opportunity to discover if you are compatible, have things in common, or are generally interested in them beyond the physical.

• Take note of the intent of your interest.  If you are on the dating site for different reasons do not waste the other persons time.  Don't ask for a random hook-up if it clearly states on their profile that they are seriously looking for a relationship.  This will save not only your time, but theirs too.

• When responding to emails or messages do not make the other person do all the work.  Questions go both ways and not taking the time to ask questions about the other person leads them to believe you are only interested in them getting to know  you.  The whole point is getting to know each other.

• Always leave messages that can be responded too.  Often responses are not given to blunt answers or messages that do not lead to more conversation.  Recipients can easily lose interest if they feel they are not getting anything in return and appear to be doing all the work.  If you are not a great conversationalist on screen then your potential partner will be envisioning one LONG date if they ever agreed to go out with you.

• Take note of what is said in conversations.  Nothing makes someone feel more special then a person referring to something that they said a few days ago.  It shows genuine interest from the person talking to them.

• Leave the more personal questions for when you have been speaking for a while.  Respect that some people take longer to be comfortable getting into the more intimate details or even giving out their mobile number.

The Sex Bucket List:- 20 Things to do sexually

Almost everyone has a bucket list, whether it be physically written down somewhere or safe in the confines of their minds.  More often then not there is a item on the list that has a sexual nature.  Here is a bucket list solely meant for those naughty things in life that just can't be missed. 

1. On a running washing machine or dryer – Make washing your clothes erotic and get down and dirty while they are busy getting clean.

2. Have sex in the rain – Take a romantic kiss in the rain that one step further and create a new meaning to getting wet.  Slip and slide anyone?

3. In a tent – You’re in the middle of nowhere with the wilderness of the unknown just outside a flimsy material wall. Show em whose boss with your screams.

4. In your office – Wait until you’re the only one in the office and invite your partner to christen your desk... or better yet, your bosses!

5. On a water bed – Remember how fun it was to be on a water bed as a kid?... now imagine making love on it!

6. On an air mattress – Try not to squeak so much you wake up the people in the same room.

7. Under the stars – Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star......

8. On a trampoline – Hey, they were designed for fun!

9. At the drive in – Be daring and get it on in your car knowing you are surrounded by other cars. Movie? What Movie? :)

10. On a rooftop – You've tried sex under your roof, now try sex on it.

11. On a boat - Nautically Naughty! Time to rock the boat :) 

12. In an elevator – Get him up while you’re on your way up :) See if you can get him/her off before you reach the floor you need.

13. In a bouncy house - Colorful, big, bouncy and fun... No-one can resist stepping inside a bounce house and going wild.  

14. On an aeroplane – Start your next holiday of with a bang and join the mile high club.

15. Have a threesome - Hot, Hot, Hot.

16. Use a sex toy on someone else – Add a little buzz to your love life.

17. Have a one night stand – Spend the night with someone you don’t know. A one night stand can be a pleasurable experience filled with thrilling excitement.

18. Have sex with someone younger – Every woman should have sex with a younger man. Their energy and enthusiasm will make you feel younger than ever.

19. Sex in a foreign country (with a foreigner) – Find a new way of communicating. Sex is a language we all understand.

20. Be a sexual slave for the night – Have your partner command you with sexual requests for an entire night. Everything that’s asked you must do.

How To Avoid The Drunken Dial

When you're out on the town with your friends or just having a girly cocktail night at home, it can be hard to resist the urge to call your latest crush or ex boyfriend with the new found confidence that has emerged with your alcohol consumption. These calls can leave you with regret and embarrassment for days after when you have slept off your drunkenness. Worst of all, sometimes you don’t even remember what was said. So even if something of significance was discussed you would not be able to remember it anyway. This can be particularly regretful or embarrassing if the person that you have drunk dialled was sober at the time of your slurring conversational skills. Drunk dialling can be extremely difficult to avoid, but here are a few suggestions to help you with the avoidance.

1 Control your drinking. Number one is quite obvious. If you control the amounts of alcohol you consume you will have better control of your actions which will ultimately mean better judgement calls and hopefully these calls will stop you from getting stuck in the drunk dial trap.

2 Entrust your phone to a friend. Choose a friend who will be able to keep your phone safe. It also has to be a friend that won’t give in to your pleas. This person should be someone who is capable of determining what calls are genuinely important. Your phone should not be returned until you have awoken and sobered up the following day. The phone carer must also be someone who is responsible enough not to lose your phone either.

3 Leave your phone at home. If you know that you have no self control and that your friends give in to your whining way too easily, sometimes the only answer is to leave your phone at home. Make sure that your friends have access to their phone or a public phone so you are able to call a taxi or designated driver to come and get you at the end of the night or early hours of the next morning.

4 Delete problem numbers. Sometimes you have no option but to have your phone on you in case of emergencies. Try writing down problem numbers from your phone before deleting them so that it is impossible to drunk dial certain people without first finding the piece of paper that you have documented their number on. Potential drunk dial receivers are anyone you may have feelings for, your ex or anyone you are mad at.

5 Phone Applications. There are several different apps that have been created for your phone to stop you from making this mistake. Check out the options that are available for your phone type to help you prevent making yet another drunken call.

Interview with Kristy Berridge

For those unaware, we are privileged to have one of the most talented Australian authors within our midst. Kristy Berridge is the author of such novels as "The Hunted," "The Damned" and most recently "Diary of a Teenage Zombie."  Possessing the ability to write original supernatural fiction novels is among her many talents.  My favourite thing about Kristy's work is that I know it will be nothing like I have read before.  To celebrate her recent book release of  "Diary of a Teenage Zombie," (of which I am totally in love with!) I have asked her to do an interview for my blog so that I can share her creations with the world.  My interview with the lovely Kristy Berridge, went a little something like this......

If you could work with any author who would it be? 

I have absolutely no idea. Writing is very much a solo act. So to collaborate with someone might actually annoy me, but I’d love to pick Stephen King’ s brain, find out where all those kooky ideas come from.

Who is your favourite author and is your writing style similar to theirs? 
I love Richelle Mead, and though I’d love to say I was as talented with the written word as she, I think we all have our positives and negatives.

What do you think people search for in a book?
Total immersion—a chance to escape reality for just a little while.

Did you always want to write?
I’ve always had an interest in writing, but no. I’m actually a fully trained Interior Designer, so creativity does run through my veins.

Do you have any advice for other writers? 

Read as much as you can, never think you are so good that advice is unwarranted, and always make sure you have a fabulous editor. If they’re good, they’ll tell you when you’re not, but also offer the best advice on how to fix it.

When and why did you begin writing?
I started writing about seven years ago now, and truthfully it was to abate boredom. I’d always had an interest, an idea bloomed, and since I was sitting in front of a computer at the time, boom, the magic happened and I couldn’t seem to stop.

Which is your favourite of the books you have written?
Tricky, tricky. I love The Damned in the Hunted series because the story finally grabs its momentum, but I’m especially proud of Diary of a Teenage Zombie. I feel good about the humour, the plot and characters.

What do you think makes a good story?
Good ideas, good editing and trust in the reader’s ability to interpret your vision without constant repetition.

What about the horror genre interests you?
Are you kidding? Everything.

Do you remember the first horror book that you ever read?
RL Stine’s ‘Goosebumps’ series. I absolutely adored these as a kid, but quickly moved onto the likes of Dean Koontz and Stephen King before long.

How do you react to a bad review of one of your books?
You have to take it in your stride. Not everyone is going to appreciate your efforts and that’s okay. I always contact the person in question, thank them for taking the time to read and review the novel and wish them the best of luck. It’s worked well for me so far, and I often receive some feedback that helps me to reassess my own writing.

What book are you reading now?
I’m being lazy and not really reading anything at all at the moment.

How do you cope with writers block?
I’ve never suffered from writer’s block because I always jot down ideas when they come to me, so there’s something to work with in dryer moments of incoming inspiration.

If you were writing a book about your life, what would the title be?
Kristy Berridge?

My life is an ongoing novel, so the question mark pretty much covers every new day and the unknowns I’ll undoubtedly face. It’s exciting though.

I suspect I’d come up with a much better name given the time and the desire to do so J

Who is your favourite character(s) in any of your works? And why?
I love Lucas Manory. He was written as a supporting role to Elena in my Hunted series, but is fast developing his own agenda and blossoming personality. He’s very likeable on so many levels.

How do you feel while you're writing? 
At peace, though I feel as if all I do is edit lately grrrr.

What was the hardest part of writing for you?Marketing and promotion. Honestly, I’m rubbish at it. I want the books to sell themselves and that’s not exactly realistic, or so people keep telling me LOL!

How do you keep your plots unpredictable without sacrificing believability?
Why thank you, and I’m not entirely sure how to answer that. All I can say is that I really put myself in the character’s shoes and think about who they are, what they think, feel or do in any given situation. If it seems ridiculous, then it probably is.

How can readers discover more about you and your work?

Website: http://www.kristyberridge.com/

Blog: http://kristyberridge.blogspot.com.au/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Hunted/116951581718393

Twitter: https://twitter.com/KristyBerridge

Pinterest: http://www.pinterest.com/kristyberridge/

Goodreads:http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4962350.Kristy_Berridge

Look out for these best sellers at a store near you!

THE DAMNED—Book Description 

Life for Elena Manory skipped past ordinary just over a month ago. Discovering she was born a practically invulnerable vampire-werewolf hybrid was shocking enough; but she’s also become a target, hunted by an Alpha werewolf known as Roshan, who’s fixated on the properties of her unique blood and the pleasurable possibilities of her flesh. Moving to the Institute of Magical Intervention in Romania was supposed to provide her with protection and anonymity, but Elena soon realises her enemies are legion. No one is who they seem, no agenda truly without nefarious intentions. A strange twist of fate and the actions of a vampire previously pressing for her affections lead Elena into the arms of another—one whose middle name spells trouble. Himself a vampire, Sebastian is handsome, arrogant, and perplexingly familiar. He introduces Elena to a world she never thought possible, uncovers a past believed buried, and unearths a future she may not survive.

DIARY OF A TEENAGE ZOMBIE—Book Description

Dear Diary. Today I ate the mailman. My bad. 

Being seventeen is hard – Katie Palmer has to deal with school, pimples, hormonal boys, and malicious cheerleaders. After the Zombie Apocalypse, though, she no longer sweats the usual teenage drama. 
Athletics star by day and flesh-eater by night, Katie’s done well to hide her transformation from friends and Zone-sanctioned security, but now someone or something’s onto her secret and if she doesn’t feed soon she’ll start falling apart. 
Dead bodies are piling up and all the evidence points to Katie’s blood-stained hands. Will she end up killing the competition before security discovers she’s rotten underneath?

I Don't Like Cricket, Oh no.. I Love It!

With enormous pride coursing through my veins after Shane Watson's outstanding and admirable performance for the Australian Cricket Team in the first day of the Fifth Test at The Oval yesterday, I have been left with the urge to post something Cricket.  Watson copped a ball just below the ear coming at him at 88mph at the hands of England's Stuart Broad.  I always get a little nervous when Broad's up to bowl but now it will be for a whole different reason.  Watson went on to make his career best of 176 runs, which in my opinion should go down in the history books after a blow like that.  What a trooper! I could write all day about how Shane Watson is the best all-rounder cricketer around, but I sadly think I would be the only one who would get anything out of it or read it for that matter.  So......

Have you found yourself in a relationship where your partner is obsessed with watching the Cricket?  I myself was in this situation a couple of years ago... and then I actually started paying attention and walked out with a love of cricket that my next partner will have to tolerate.  (*Inserts evil laugh here*) Cricket in someway has always been part of my family as my granddad used to play and umpire, but it wasn't until I met a cricket obsessed boyfriend that I even bothered to give it the time of day.  Little by little I picked up things while watching, but why not take a few minutes now to learn some basics that are sure to impress your partner.  I will admit in Cricket, there is much to learn, but what I have found is that the more I learn the more I enjoy the game.  So next time your partner tries to explain to you what is happening, you can knock their socks off and finish their sentence.  Of course there will still be much to learn but it can't hurt to start here.

To start with TERMINOLOGY:-

• "Stump" - A stump is the three vertical posts that form the wicket. 
• "Off Stump" - Is the stump on the offside of the wicket.  Or better described as the same side of the batsman's bat. (this can change depending on if the batsmen are left or right handed.) 
• "Middle Stump" - Is the center stump as per names suggestion.
• "Leg Stump" - Is the stump on the onside of the wicket.  Which means the same side as the batsman's leg. (also can change depending on if the batsmen are left or right handed.)
• "Stumps" - Is also a term that is used to indicate the end of a days play.
• "No ball" - Is a ball delivered incorrectly and becomes a penalty to the fielding team.  The batting side receives an additional run and another ball must be bowled in its place. 
• "Beamer" - Is a ball that does not bounce and passes above the batsman's waist height.  The penalty of a beamer is an instant no ball. 
• "Wide Ball" - A wide ball is a delivery of the ball either too wide or high for a batsman to hit.  This is determined by the umpire.
• "Third Umpire" - the third umpire is an off field umpire, also known as a TV umpire.  This umpire makes final decisions on questions passed on to him by the two umpires on the field.  
• "Hat Trick" - A hat trick, not to be mistaken with a velvet hat trick LOL, is when a bowler takes out 3 wickets one after another. 
  

Now for the BASICS:-

• There are 11 players per side.
• Each turn to bat while the other team fields is known as an innings.
• There are 6 balls bowled in an over.
• Boundaries: 4 points are earned when the ball bounces before the barrier. 6 points are earned if the ball goes over the barrier or into the crowed.
• A Test Match has four innings.  Meaning each team bats and fields twice.
• A One Day International (ODI) have a set number of overs that each team face.
• Twenty20 International have 20 overs per side.
• "How's That!" is a phrase yelled out when a fielder believes a batsmen is out.  It is then up to the umpire to make the call.
• A batsmen can be run out or stumped if any part of him or his bat are behind the crease.

And lastly, WAYS A BATSMEN GETS OUT:-

• BOWLED - When a wicket is hit by a bowlers delivery of the ball.  It does not matter if the ball has first touched the bat, glove or any part of the batsmen beforehand.
• CAUGHT - If the ball hits the bat or the batman's hand before being caught by a fielder, they are out.
• TIMED OUT - The next batsman up after the previous batsman is out has 3 minutes to be at the crease ready for play.
• HIT THE BALL TWICE - If the ball is hit twice by the batsman other then for reasoning of protecting his wicket, he is out. 
• HIT WICKET - After a balls delivery if a batsman's body or bat knocks his wicket out, he is out.
• OBSTRUCTING THE FIELD - If a batsman purposely obstructs the opposing team by word or action, he is out.
• RUN OUT - If the wicket is put down whilst the batsman is behind the crease at any time during the play of the ball.
• STUMPED - If the batsmen is out of his crease and not attempting to run the wicket keeper can put down the wicket resulting in the batsmen being out.
• LEG BEFORE WICKET (LBW) - The fielding side is entitled to appeal if the ball hits any part of the batsman (with the exception of the hand holding the bat) but would have otherwise hit the wicket if the batsman had not been in the way.

Remember, don't be afraid to ask questions.  If it's something they are passionate about they will be more then willing to teach you all they know.  And more importantly, impressed by your interest in not only letting them spend date night watching the game, but that you are taking the extra mile and learning about something that is important to them.

And even if I am the only person who will ever read this post.... at least I can look back on the little things I have learnt as a proud Australian Cricket supporter!  And, thank god for commentators and wikipedia :)  I don't like cricket.. oh no, I LOVE IT ! 

The Curse of Unrequited Love

Unrequited love is among the most painful things that one can feel and unfortunately we have all felt the heartache that comes with it at least once in our lives.

To add to this, social media makes it so easy to look into things that are said. You find yourself asking, “What does he/she mean by that?” or “Does that mean he/she is thinking about me.” Or my favourite, “What he/she really means is.” The entirety of it can be exhausting. And because you are feeling something that they are not aware of, it can result in emotional draining. You get defensive over text messages that may very well just be an outcome of you misreading what is written. Or alternatively to this, even making excuses for someone mistreating you.

You distance yourself from the person to ease the hurt and hopefully take away your feelings for them, but instead you find yourself romanticizing them. Focusing on all the things that they would do if you were with them, or even magnifying what they have done in the past, much like you would do in a toxic relationship. You find yourself focusing on the things that they have done in the past or what you hope they would do, rather then what they actually do.

There is no easy way to escape this curse. There is always the option of telling the person your true feelings, which can possibly lead to your feelings being returned, but if this backfires you are left with nothing but rejection. Fear of rejection is ultimately what stops us from expressing our true feelings to the people we have them for. And our lack of belief in ourselves is what leads us to think that we are not remarkable enough for the person of our desires to notice us in any real way.  Some people just aren't ready to let go of the possibilities that can be shattered when those feelings are not returned.

There really are only 2 options:

1.   Tell the person. If they do not feel the same, you no longer have the hope and can take the first steps to moving on with your life and finding someone who can return your feelings.

2.    Keep prolonging the negative feelings that come with your secret until the object of your desire has unknowingly hurt you more then you can handle.

I say, do everything you can to convince yourself to tell your crush how you feel. At least then you know if there is a chance, as opposed to wasting your time hoping that there may be one and trying to find signs of interest or common feelings. Life is too short to play the “what if” game. Nobody likes playing games when it comes to their feelings, so why subject yourself to doing just that? Take the risk and believe that you are worthy of being loved back. If they do not see you for who you are then the only solution to this is finding someone who does. No need to change or downplay yourself just because someone is blind to your worth.

At the end of the day, there really are no answers to this one. Some situations can be stickier then others. Some people just don’t have the option to be able to tell the person of their passion how they feel. Whether it be because your crush is married, in a relationship, a parent of your friend, or even a really close family friend. These situations leave prolonged awkwardness. Not everyone has the opportunity to walk away if things do not go the way they hope. If you have any ideas on how to cope with unrequited love or any personal stories of your own experiences, please share in the comment box below. Your experience may help someone else.

Hens Night Madness!!

Just a quick update of my awesomely fun-filled weekend. There is nothing like a traditional hens night party to bring out all the willies and equally just as much alcohol and girly immature fun :) 

Saturday night found me slipping into my cricket outfit, complete with mini bat, cap and sneakers and enthusiastically playing the part along with my friends with parts of their own: Dee (the nun and bride to be), East (the bad ass biker chick) and Mel (the hot teacher)! 

The night consisted of penis straws and rings, a shirtless waiter, inflatable doodles, a male blow up doll, a pin the willy on the man, a peni piñata filled with condom surprises, ginormous granny undies that read "size matters" (that I did a little dancing in!), terrible karaoke attempts, a blindfold with a winky on it that resulted in my brother pointing out the obvious and calling me a dickhead (Thanks Douggie!) and I can't forget the solo 2013 Ashes cricket score checks throughout the night. 

East and I ended up going into town afterwards with new found confidence and made friends and models out of the security guys at our favourite nightclub. We also discovered fellow costume party goers even more flamboyant then ourselves that were more then happy to pose for pics. Embarrassingly after getting into the club by showing my ID, I was re-carded when getting a drink at the bar. (I still think she was trying to suss out what cricket player I was!!) :) but nothing could have been more embarrassing then discovering I still had my eye mask on my hat that read "wake me for sex!" That came off quick smart!  

Nothing like a bit of silliness to make you appreciate the people you have in your life even more then before. Wishing my beautiful friend Dionne and her husband-to-be Michael a full-filling life as husband and wife. 

To find little goodies for your hens night, check out our website www.confidenceiskeylingerie.com.au to find something a little naughty to make your night!